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  • #love #passion #truth #self-love #growth #change #blessings
  • 5 months ago
  • 3

Goodbye Brooklyn. It’s time for a new chapter.

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  • #change
  • 9 months ago
  • 1

Seasons of Circumstance

I could create cushions, pin tucked pockets of air
to ensure you never fall further than where we once stood.
is that good?
… —-Could pretend to ring in the spring
pastel my past well
so that you remain a stranger
To the coldest winters I’ve seen
yet above ground I must force sound
… from lungs that have evaporated their foundation
I must retract the tears, rewrite my years
so that perchance,
we could become
more than just shadows of circumstance

And now,
now that the time has elapsed
I place ears to unfounded fears
that pale in comparison to the questions I’ve asked.
Yet you long for a normal space,
to save your face
and keep your grace intact
in fact,
you are numb to pressure,
opt for emotional gestures of pleasure
you rather defer to silence,
preferring a forte of leisure
3 years
my soul searched, fell to seizure
and met its death,
yet you won’t show me the setting summer sun
but take issue with how the springtime left?

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  • #Love #poetry #change #creative writing #confusion
  • 2 years ago
  • 2

Love Lost/Love Found

Little girl
Little girl with
Little curls
Taking cues from her converse shoes
All Star
Up & Comer
She’s crossed countries,
Runner
Who reads Bach
In Rebook Classic; Literature major
With a mind that made her write too much
when she should have been listening,
“see, algebra is dissin’ my creativity”
the argument made to her counselor
As she defended why she scored all D’s.
 
She later failed business law that week.
 
See, I can’t sit in a class designed to teach me about a justice system that’s anything but; the better half statistically still the minority
Politicians lobbying for the black vote
Though the blacks won’t make a dent in the percentage of all votes electorally
Nah, son… that law ain’t for me
 
Little girl
Little girl
With her hips too thick to be invisible
Quickly learned that one nation under a censored mind can be divisible
She kept her notebook close
Just to make the home life livable
Ballpoint blue ink
penned her pain down in intervals
 
Little girl
Fell in love
Fell because his arms appeared strong enough to hold her
But the arms strong enough to hold her
We also strong enough to hold her down
To let her drown in a sea that was getting to deep to swim in
Trends too far out for her to blend in
Now she’s bending
And there’s no one there to help control the damage
She’s busy tending to his wounds
As she’s bleeds her forced miscarriage
Where does the time go.
But she loves him though.
She still aches for his eyes
And  it’s been a while since she’s smiled.
 
But, Its whatever, right?
 
Little girl
Little girl lost
Erased from memory, weakened beyond repair
Tried to make love bloom
Instead tossed her petals into hands
That closed them too soon.
Aware of her worth,
Her power, her heart
She scoured remnants her of pride
New chapter
New start
 
Love freely
Love deep
Don’t dumb your heart down
For the sake of the antiquated standards you keep.
Love honestly
Love true
Love no one else
Before you.
 
Little girl
Little girl with
Little curls
Taking cues from my  converse shoes
All Star
Up & Comer
I’ve  climbed  mountains
Runner
Who reads Bach
In Rebook
Classic; Literature major
With a mind that made me write too much
Now I’m  always  listening,
“see, succumbing to this pain  is dissin’ my creativity”
the argument made on days
where living gets the best of me
 
Love freely
Love deep
Don’t dumb your heart down
For the sake of the antiquated standards you keep.
Love honestly
Love true
Love no one else
Before you.
 

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  • #Love #pain #change #hurt #strength #pride #youth #sadness #rebirth #wonen #International women's month
  • 2 years ago
  • 3

Junction

I have arrived at the junction
The impasse,
 where I pass the time, and in seconds flat
can see the missteps my lips kept;                               (you from calling).
 
The wind blew, and upswept the truth,
Hidden behind love’s generic definition
Too often the folly of our youth;                                (is that we believe it).
 
See it, was never the wrong time or weather
To tempt mistress fate
And wear my innocence like armor
But as cyclical as karma [can be]
I couldn’t see the forest; fire
At me—
Perched atop the acme of my academics
I understood my limits and flirted with the technical gimmicks
I sold my soul to mimic—
A heart full of store-brand, second hand sin, 
that never once took my mind where my heart has never been;     
(now all my movements come into question).
 
 
I kissed him. Fresh from the sands of Iraq
Wiped the sweat from his back,
I struggled to fill the shoes in a life I didn’t own
A name that wasn’t mine
And a love I convinced myself I could believe in
As long as the government paid on time;
                                                                                (What was I thinking?)
 
It was an equation doomed to fail
Read the writing on the wall,
Even though blinded,
It was Braille
Pilled my inches into a mile
Picked up the pieces, ironed the creases
took the ashes of my first child;
                                                            (I took the high road, with a lighter load to carry).
  
I found myself back at the junction
The impasse,
 where I passed  the time, and in seconds flat
can see the missteps my lips kept;                               (you from calling).
 
The wind blew, and upswept the truth,
Hidden behind love’s generic definition
Too often the folly of our youth;                                (is that we believe it).
 
Silence.
Created the most awkward of pauses;
Invented the most worthy of causes to see you
In passing; glances
Wished for honesty;
But honestly,
I’m not as brave as my hands
Who declare their intent for duality openly—
 
Open me;
for I’ve longed to be read.
 
Across the table, I am cautious
Fidgeting,
pushing my heart underneath my neatly turned up sleeves
Enjoying the hum of your words over laughter,
Listening to the symphony of clinching silverware
Conga drums, and bass guitars
Over melodies that intertwine like bodies
In a minor key
In a moment we—
Begin to understand

Your eyelids grazed mine
as a decade’s worth of pleasantries bounced of my collarbone
the taxicab was cold on the way home; was where you were headed.
                                                                                              
You kissed me. Playing well within your boundaries
As the lines of demarcation found their way buried deep into the sand
You reached for my hand, after assuring I’d be safe in them.
 
I found myself back at the junction
The impasse,
 where I passed  the time, and in seconds flat
can see it was the heights my heart lept,                               that kept you from letting
me
go.
 
The wind blew, and upswept the truth,
Hidden behind the silent definition of what love is
And the beauty is that we believe it
                                                                                                (We believe it).

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  • #Poetry #spilled ink #love #relationships #youth #growing up #change #journal entry #confessions #spoken word
  • 2 years ago
  • 3

Newsworthy Tuesday: A Change in the Weather

Happy Tuesday Ink.Blot Beauties!

I trust everyone is in fine health! This weather has been quite disheartening as of late, its like April decided to father November’s bastard child. I’m not a cold-weather fan as you can probably tell by now— I like it warm.

The tail end of September into the beginnings of October has been a particularly eventful couple of weeks for me on so many levels. I finally am saying my goodbyes to New York, and I’m crossing the river over into New Jersey—but have no fear, I will still do my NYT crosswords, refuse to speak to anyone on mass transit without having my coffee beforehand, watch the NY Giants play, and cheer loud and hard for my boys in pinstripe. I’ll still order my fresh direct, think i can hail a cab for a few weeks, and shop the “Bloomies” sale rack as if there was no tomorrow.

I’m moving— not converting.

On an emotional note, I believe there’s a lot of change in the air. My philosphopy on me being the “eternal giver” not of things, but of myself and relinquishing the priveledge of recieving seems to be disproving itself slowly. The re-education of my self-manufactured dogma which took years to create, convince and practice is finally reaching its end. The power of love is rearing its delicate head, looking at me with softened interest, selecting me as a worthy recipient of an all-encompassing depth, steeped in reality and truth.

I gaze at its progress in complete wonderment. Feelings such as these, have never been born before. Strength such as this, has never been known before. So i’m letting it all go, becuase its safe too, because life has steered me into understanding, compassionate arms that were created to hold me and I’m not turning back—ever.

I’m sure poetry will spew from my pores about this. Or maybe this is the one side of me that the world will not read. You’ll just have to catch my face in a store window, or side mirror to see the ever growing sea that continues to swell.

Work is— well work. Things are shapeshifing, my role is morphing into a prototyoe of a beast I have not the words yet to define— and that’s okay. I’m biding my time, keeping my claws sharp and assuring that my focus is even sharper. These folks are never quite ready.

I’m adoring change. From apartment decor, to the temperature of my reality. I love it all.

Now if we could just do something with this rain…

Until next time,

-M

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  • #blog post #change #cold #emotion #entry #happiness #journal #love #prose #tuesday #weather #work #ink blot #diary #diary entry
  • 2 years ago
  • 3

Present(ly)

You disconnected the moon
Pulling plugs from their nesting place
Resting place(s); an
Undue strain
On becoming professionally
Forgetful


You repositioned my interior; designed
Major capital improvements to my state of mind
Now the constellations are all jumbled
Words have lost their luster
As limbs become numb
Dumb; founded upon the vertigo
My heart undergoes
When the clouds refuse to wait
And drop their weight
Without you


There were simpler times
I do recall,
When the predictability of my existence
Did suffice
I pressed pleats into pants
Of longing
And my temperamental
Temptations never played nice
There were brief moments of clarity
But the inevitability of my actions
Made for disparaging creative outbursts
Overly punctuated poetry
Chaotic misusage of rhyme over reason
I became Lincoln and Burr
in triumph and treason
yes, there were simpler times
amidst highly complicated seasons
I sprung forward
Falling several years behind.


But on cue
You eight-balled your way into my subway car
Changed your destination
So we’d arrive precisely at the same junction
abbreviated your formalities
so I and my impulses could function
you said the world, was your oyster bar; none
your brand was superior
I took your breath away
and re-scripted your past in Technicolor
made sense of the present tense
however we,
were quite comfortable
the evening was closing
and our hearts were busy making frankincense
I was taken by the ease
In your plea
For my free
-dom
Personified.
This planetary shift was justified


It seems to me the mystery of love
All it’s miscellaneous screws and oddly shaped cogs
Gears and tools forged to amend
Pride and individualistic notions
To serve and protect
The fragile and needy
Are clearly
improperly defined
Constantly exiled from the proper context
And integrated into the most
Inadequate of mental tapestries
How the failure to correct such
Fallacies
Angers me


But I digress,
the reason for this diatribe
Has nothing to do with this


You interrupted my pattern of
Procrastination
Directly communicated the idiocy behind
“Taking it slow”
So you took my affection
In a “To go” compartment
So that you could savor me
In the privacy of your own
Apartment
After which, meant
We could never be apart
Hearts bent
On rezoning
Historical lines of demarcation
Redrawing fault lines
Shaken by the quake


You disconnected the moon
While in search for a more appropriate light source to compare me to
Now our nights will never be the same


You repositioned my interior; designed
Major capital improvements to my state of mind
Now the constellations are all jumbled
Words have lost their shine
limbs become numb
Dumb; founded upon the vertigo
My heart undergoes
When the clouds refuse to wait
And instead elect to drop their weight upon the ground
Without you;


Everything is lost
In translation,
everything I’ve lost
is now present(ly) found.

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  • #love #poetry #chance #casual encounters #subway romance #destiny #life #direction #change
  • 3 years ago
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